At first, it can seem harmless. Maybe even charming. But over time, it becomes exhausting. Because you didn’t enter a relationship to raise someone, you entered it to build something with someone.
If you’ve been feeling drained, frustrated, or emotionally overwhelmed, here are 10 clear signs you might be dealing with a man-child.
1. He Dodges Responsibility Whenever Possible
Responsibility is what separates the kids from the adults.
How he approaches responsibilities in all areas of his life is a big indicator.
Does he avoid paying bills on time, showing up to work, or keeping commitments?
Does he push tasks off on you? Make excuses? Hope things just “work out?”
Anytime things go wrong, do you find him blaming others rather than accepting ownership?
How you approach personal responsibility shows in every area of your life. If he’s flying by the seat of his pants with no intention of sorting his sh*t out, that drops the majority of the responsibility on you. And that’ll drain you after a while.
Read also: 10 Traits of an Insecure Man
2. You Feel Like You’re Constantly Parenting Him
Reminding him of what to do
Questioning his decisions
Managing your emotions around his behaviors
Sound familiar?
There’s a subtle difference between supporting your partner and parenting your partner.
When you feel like you have to manage his emotions and behaviors all the time, that’s when things can get draining.
You deserve a relationship with someone where you BOTH feel emotionally supported and balanced.
Read also: 12 Signs a Married Man Is Using You
3. He Has a Hard Time Taking Criticism
Even when you’re calm and trying to discuss things logically, he may explode or shut down.
If every time you offer constructive criticism or advice he gets defensive, that’s immaturity.
No one likes being told they messed up, but how you respond shows maturity.
If your partner can’t handle you disagreeing with him, or asking for him to change something about his behavior, you’re going to have a really hard time growing with him.
Relationships require you to work through conflict, not avoid it or let it destroy you.
Read also: 10 Ways to Deal With Separation in Marriage
4. “Fun” Comes Before Being an Adult Every Time
Again, there’s nothing wrong with having fun.
But if he makes “fun” a priority every single time he’s faced with real life or responsibilities, that could be a problem.
Chasing distractions instead of tackling things head on.
Avoiding conversations about the future or “adulting.”
Always making excuses when he has to do something he doesn’t want to do.
These are all examples of avoiding life discipline. And if he’s never going to grow up enough to better himself, that could be a problem for your relationship down the road.
5. He Relies on You Too Much Emotionally
Relationships require support from both partners.
If he leans on you too much emotionally, whether that be sex, validation, or just overall stability, but struggles to provide the same amount of support to you, that could be an issue.
You should feel secure knowing your partner has your back, no matter what.
Feel like you can’t rely on him to be there for you when you need him? That’s when things can get draining.
A relationship should be about two people emotionally supporting each other, not just one.
6. He Avoids Serious Conversations
You know the types of conversations:
The budget
Future plans
Areas of the relationship he’s hurting you without realizing
He simply avoids them at all costs.
Avoidance might feel good in the short term, but it doesn’t fix anything.
As long as he’s putting off dealing with his issues, he’ll never grow as a person, and your relationship will never grow.
Healthy relationships are built on communication, even when it feels scary or uncomfortable.
7. He’s Inconsistent at Best
He says he’ll change. He says he understands.
But when it comes time to follow through with his words, there’s little action.
If he makes you believe everything is going to be okay one day, only to do the same thing over and over again, it’s going to drain you emotionally.
Consistency is key when it comes to trust. If you can’t trust that he will follow through with what he says, it’ll do nothing but wear you down.
8. He Never Takes Responsibility for His Actions
It’s always the job.
It’s everyone else’s fault but his.
Sucks to be you.
If he makes you feel bad for ANY reason, that’s a problem.
Yes, things outside of his control may have affected the outcome.
But at the end of the day, if he doesn’t take any responsibility for his words or actions, he will never better himself.
Personal growth comes when you decide that you don’t want to live your life the way you are currently living and you do something about it.
9. He Has No Sense of Direction
Again, nobody’s perfect and it’s okay to not have your sh*t completely together.
But if he doesn’t have any goals for his life, or has no desire to do better for himself, that could be trouble.
Relationships are about growing together.
If he has no idea what he wants, how is he going to grow WITH you?
You deserve someone who has a sense of purpose and is going to fight for your future.
10. You Feel More Exhausted Than Loving
Listen to your gut.
At the end of the day, if you feel drained after spending time with your guy, that’s not okay.
Not every part of a relationship is going to be rainbows and butterflies.
But you should FEEL loved when you’re with your partner, not feel like you’re constantly pouring from an empty cup.
Your emotional and mental health is IMPORTANT. Don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise.
Conclusion
Remember these 10 signs…
Dating a man isn’t always black and white.
Oftentimes, you don’t realize you’re dating a man child until it’s been going on for a very long time.
The more you adapt to his behaviors, the more they become “normal” to you, even when it’s not healthy.
You deserve to be with a partner that makes you feel good, not one that requires you to drop everything to “take care of” them.
If you recognize these signs in your relationship, don’t automatically assume he’s incapable of growing up.
While some people are difficult to rid of their childish ways, others can change with patience and the RIGHT guidance.
What matters is you knowing the difference.
The moment you know what you’ll ACCEPT and what you won’t accept, you won’t tolerate anymore.
Only YOU have the power to decide what you’ll allow in your life and relationships.
YOU decide.
FAQ
What does it mean when you call someone a man child?
A man child is typically someone who behaves or acts emotionally immature in their relationships and day to day life.
Is it normal to date a man child?
It’s normal at first. We all act immature sometimes. It’s when the childish behavior continues over a long period of time that it becomes a problem.
How do you deal with a man child girlfriend?
The best way to deal with a man child is to HOPE they’ll grow up. But you can’t make someone change who they are. If his behavior continues to be childish and you’re unable to come to an understanding with him, you may need to let him go.
How do you stop caring about a man child?
You don’t. You break up with him. Continuing to care about someone that is damaging your mental, physical, and emotional well being won’t do you any good. Train yourself to want the best for YOU.
Can you truly love a man child?
Of course! But you’ll only truly love HIM when he decides to better himself and becomes the best partner you know he can be.
If you decide to stay with a man child, you better REALLY love him because he’s going to test that love. And push it.
You deserve to be with someone who matches the love, time, and effort you put into them.
When should you walk away from a man child?
If he’s displaying multiple signs on this list and is WILLINGLY not changing his behavior after you’ve communicated with him about it, maybe it’s time to walk away.
Not everyone can grow up and that’s perfectly fine. But you deserve a partner who will TRY to better themselves for you.
Save the pin for later
