One woman in particular really stuck with me. She came to me because her husband wasn’t into her like he used to be. She felt unwanted and wondered if she wasn’t attractive to him anymore.
After talking more, we discovered the issue wasn’t attraction at all.
Yes… it’s true. Even when two people fall deeply in love and build a life together, things can happen that cause attraction to fade. The truth is that when life gets busy and overwhelming, maintaining attraction often falls by the wayside. Couples get stuck in a rut, and things that used to spark passion and physical connection are replaced with responsibilities.
But here’s the good news.
Women don’t need to change their hair color or figure out a complicated secret to get their man to want them more. Attraction is powerful and often stimulated by small, emotional things men don’t even realize.
If you want your partner to desire you more, you have to focus less on trying to control his reaction and more on enhancing the natural connection you two share.
You’ve probably heard that actions speak louder than words. When it comes to attraction, smaller changes in your attitude, behavior, and appearance can also spark a big change in how much your partner wants to jump into bed with you.
6 Sneaky Ways to Make Him Want You in Bed
1. Stop Being Available All the Time
Predictability is a great relationship killer.
Do you know what your husband is doing right now? Does he know exactly where you are and what you’re doing at every moment of the day?
If his schedule doesn’t vary from yours at all, he may lose interest.
Maintaining your own hobbies, interests, and friendships is important. When you’re with your partner, you can relax and be yourself. You’re not relying solely on each other for entertainment and stimulation.
Take up a hobby. Go out with friends once in a while. Spend time taking care of “you” so you can spend time with “him.”
Your independence will remind him that you’re your own person with your own passions. It also creates mystery, which can spark his curiosity.
Attraction doesn’t thrive when everything is predictable. By giving him a chance to miss you, you may find he desires you more than ever.
Read also: How to Stop Being Too Available (13 tips)
2. Create Emotional Build Up
Way too many women focus purely on the physical stuff that goes on in the bedroom.
Build emotional tension throughout the day, and you’ll create build up by the time you two actually hop into bed.
Send him a playful text message in the middle of the day. Give him a compliment before he leaves for work in the morning. Have a special keyword that makes you guys smile whenever one of you says it.
The smallest things can build emotion and anticipation that lasts all day long.
Little things like this feed into emotional intimacy, which is a huge part of feeling attracted to your partner.
Read also: 15 Different Types of Foreplay to Try As A Couple
3. Take Care of Yourself
Please don’t misunderstand me.
I’m not suggesting you change your entire look or become someone you’re not. I’m talking about taking better care of yourself for YOU.
You liked the way you looked yesterday. Like how you smell. Like your style.
When you feel good about yourself, your partner will notice.
Exercise, get enough sleep, eat healthy, take showers, and wear deodorant. Feel good about how you look, and others will too.
Self confidence is attractive. Period.
If you want your partner to desire you more, you have to want to take care of yourself more.
Read also: 105 Flirty Text Messages for Him
4. Surprise Him Every Once in a While
Have you ever noticed how fun relationships are in the beginning?
There’s newness and surprises around every corner. But as time goes on, you two can fall into a bland routine where there’s little variation.
Sure, you can plan a fancy date night every now and then. But small surprises can have a big impact as well.
Make his favorite meal unexpectedly. Throw a date night together on a random Wednesday. Wear something sexier than usual. Change your routine.
Inserting little surprises here and there will remind him that there’s still plenty to discover about you.
And when you keep your partner guessing, you will spark his attraction.
5. Make Him Feel Wanted
A common mistake women make is thinking they’re the only ones who want to feel desired.
Men want to feel wanted too.
It’s not something you’ll typically hear a man say. But your husband secretly wants to know that you still think he’s attractive too.
Give your husband a sincere compliment. Let him know you notice the things he does for you. Point out when he looks good or did something you appreciated.
When you make your partner feel desired, his confidence grows. And as his confidence grows, his attraction toward you will grow as well.
Remember that attraction is a two way street. Both partners should feel wanted and desired.
6. Flaunt That You Still Flirt
Flirting is something a lot of couples forget when they settle down into a comfortable routine.
Early on in a relationship, there’s flirting around every conversation. There’s teasing, playful touches, eye contact, and inside jokes.
Then… somewhere down the road, that all changes to discussions about schedules, bills, errands, and chores.
Flip the script.
Bring back the flirting. Smirk when he tells a joke. Make eye contact and let your gaze linger when you talk. Throw each other a cute pick up line every now and then.
Flirting is intimate connection without pressure. It reminds your man that you’re not just roommates trying to run a successful household.
And when you two start flirting, you may start noticing his attraction intensify as well.
Conclusion
Wanting to improve attraction with your partner isn’t selfish. As long as you both work to keep the passion alive, your relationship will benefit.
Gain his attention by focusing on small things that matter. Stay independent. Create emotional build up. Take better care of yourself. Surprise him. Make him feel wanted. And don’t forget to flirt.
Attraction isn’t typically lost overnight. Pay attention to your relationship for long enough, and you’ll notice things slowly start to fade.
The solution? Don’t let it.
Make your partner feel attractive, and you’ll notice his desire for you skyrocket.
Attraction doesn’t just happen in healthy relationships. You have to continue to build on it.
Leave your comment below on what you’ll start doing tonight to make him want you more than ever.
FAQ
Can you make your husband want you more in bed?
Yes. There’s nothing you can do to force someone to be attracted to you. But you can build on the aspects of your relationship that naturally stimulate his attraction.
Why does attraction fade in relationships?
Attraction fades when things become boring and routine. When you both fall into a pattern of putting the other person on auto pilot.
Do guys like compliments?
Of course! Guys like hearing compliments about their appearance, their achievements, and the things they do.
Is it bad to want my husband to want me more?
Not at all! Both you and your partner should want to maintain and build attraction with one another.
What’s the most common mistake women make when trying to attract their husband?
Some think changing their appearance will create more attraction. But men are attracted to confidence much more than you think.
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