Motherhood is beautiful and hard work. Each day you spend time, effort, and love on your children. You rise early before everyone else to get them ready for the day. You stay up late at night worried and thinking about your children. You rarely spend time focusing on anyone other than others.
In the hustle and bustle of life raising children, there is one thing we tend to forget…
YOU!
“I’ll sleep when I have time.” “I don’t have time to sit down.” “I don’t want to do anything when I’m not with my kids.” Stop. Hear me out. I get it. You’re busy and tired. But what you probably don’t realize is when you fill your cup you pour better into the lives of those around you. Taking time for you doesn’t steal love from your children. It teaches them it’s okay to love on themselves too.
How to Put Yourself First as a Mom
1. Remind Yourself That You Matter
There comes a point that you have to believe you are worth it. Many mothers feel guilty for putting themselves first. We are programmed to think it’s selfish to take care of yourself. Remember you are more than a mom. You are you.
Read Also: 10 Essential Productivity Tips for Busy Moms
2. Wake Up Earlier Than Everyone Else
Set your alarm for 15 minutes earlier than normal. Use that time to wake up and be still. Sit and breathe, pray, stretch, write in a journal, or whatever helps you wake up slow.
Read Also: 15 Reasons Why Saying No is a Life Skill You Need to Learn
3. Learn to Say No
Life will constantly present you with situations that you can say yes to. But you don’t have to say yes to everything. Learn how to say no to those things that drain you. Say no to one more playdate or chore.
4. Rediscover What You Love
What were some of your favorite hobbies or interests before kids? Reading, painting, hiking? Try and fill your life with the things that you loved before kids. If you love to paint, spend 10 minutes painting or coloring. Take time to do what you love.
5. Schedule Me-Time
Never cancel your own appointments. If you schedule time to relax, don’t let something else take that time. Put me-time in your calendar.
Read Also: 16 Fun Ways to Take a Mental Break from Life
6. Don’t Wait for “Later”
You think you will have time to take care of yourself when you aren’t so busy? Yeah, that’s not going to happen! As kids get older, life just doesn’t slow down. Start where you are. Don’t wait for some imaginary time in the future when you’ll have it all together.
7. Ask for Help
Asking for help doesn’t make you weak; it makes you wise. There is no law written that says moms have to do everything on their own. Ask your husband, relatives, or friends for help.
8. Love Your Body
Your body took care of you and your children. For many of you, your body created life. You don’t have to go to the gym every day. But do take care of your body. Take a walk, stretch your legs, and get plenty of rest when you need it.
9. Make a Daily Goal For Yourself
Each day make sure to complete one thing that is just for you. Whether that be drinking eight cups of water or listening to your favorite song. Something each day.
10. Speak Gentle Words to Yourself
Words matter. The way you speak to yourself matters. Stop telling yourself you’re lazy or a failure. Remind yourself that you’re doing your best and that’s enough.
11. Put Down Your Phone
Scrolling through social media isn’t always relaxing. In fact, it may leave you more stressed than when you started. Put down your phone and be with yourself for a few minutes.
12. Don’t Feel Like You Have to Earn Rest
You don’t have to earn the right to sleep or take a break. Take naps when your kids nap. You deserve that meal and that glass of water you’re drinking. You deserve rest.
13. Don’t Neglect to Eat
Stop torturing yourself by skipping meals or eating your kids leftovers. Fill your body with good fuel. Eat good healthy meals that leave you full and energized.
Read more healthy habits for busy moms here from CDC.
14. Speak Something Positive to Yourself Daily
Stand in front of a mirror and speak something positive to yourself. I am doing my best. Or you’re enough are great phrases to start with. It may feel silly at first, but you will feel better each time you do it.
15. Remember You’re More Than a Mom
When was the last time you saw someone and described them with more than what they do? You are more than a mother, cook, employee, wife, or planner. You are a person with a heart, mind, and personality.
16. Celebrate the Small Victories
Today was hard. You survived! Give yourself a little pep in your step. Big or small, celebrate your victories because each one builds you up.
17. Keep a Journal
Grab a notebook and start writing. Write your thoughts, your fears, and what’s on your heart. Journaling allows you to empty your mind and helps you feel human again.
Need some help getting started? Check out this article from PositivePsychology.com.
18. Find Other Moms That Understand
You are not alone. Whether it be online or locally, find moms that understand what you’re going through. Sometimes all we need is someone to sit with and listen to us.
19. Release the Need to Be Perfect
Your kids will be just fine if the house isn’t perfect all the time. Your family will enjoy those tacos you made rather than eating another fancy meal. Forget about perfect and embrace real.
20. Let Your Kids Watch You Take Care of Yourself
I want my kids to grow up and see that it’s okay to take care of yourself. Let your kids see you take a nap, eat something nutritious, and say no when you’re tired. By you taking care of yourself you teach them that they matter too.
Conclusion
Moms, you are important and you are worth it. You are more than just someone’s mom. You are a human being with needs and wants. Trying to care for everyone else while forgetting to care for yourself leaves you empty. When your cup is empty you have nothing to give others.
When you begin to invest in you, you’ll discover you have more to give. You will have more joy, you will find happiness, and you will love others not because you have to but because you want to.
Start small and remember to take care of the mama!
Frequently Asked Questions
Is it selfish to put yourself first as a mom?
No. Taking time for you doesn’t steal love from your children. It helps you pour better into the lives of those around you.
How can I start prioritizing myself if I feel guilty?
Start small and remind yourself that you matter. Wanting a change doesn’t mean you’re failing—it often means you’re growing.
What if I don’t have time for self-care?
Start with 10–15 minutes. Wake up a little earlier, put me-time in your calendar, and don’t wait for “later.”
How can I take care of myself without spending money?
Simple things count: resting when you need it, taking a walk, journaling, eating well, speaking gently to yourself, and putting down your phone.
What’s one small thing I can do today just for me?
Choose one daily goal—drink water, listen to your favorite song, take a short walk, or sit quietly for a few minutes.
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