Have you ever looked at your life and realized you didn’t like what you saw?
Not in a car-crash, life-flashing-before-your-eyes kind of way. But more like those moments when you’re sitting alone with your thoughts and you know…something just feels off.
I know that look well.
My habits were weak. My mindset was limiting me. And I knew that deep down I was capable of so much more.
It’s a tough pill to swallow. When you know there’s more to your life than what you’re currently experiencing.
But knowing there’s more and taking steps to get it are two different things.
If you want to change yourself completely, you need to do more than just wish for a better life. You have to show up and take action.
These are the steps that did it for me, and they can do it for you too.
How to Change Yourself Completely (12 Tips)
1. Become Brutally Honest With Yourself
If you aren’t willing to look closely at your flaws, mistakes, and weaknesses, you’ll never change.
Most people never change because they lie to themselves.
You have to dig deep and answer these questions:
- What areas of my life are failing?
- What bad habits are holding me back?
- What am I running from?
Honest self-reflection is uncomfortable. But changing yourself starts with radical self-awareness.
Stop making excuses for your behavior or blaming it on something else. Accept your truths and move forward.
Read also: 10 Brutally Honest Quotes to Free your Mind
2. Figure Out Exactly Who You Want to Become
“I want to change my life.” – That’s not a goal.
Far too many people want to change but have zero idea who they’re becoming.
Get specific about how you want to think and how you want to behave.
- What mindset do you want to have?
- What type of habits will this new you possess?
- How will they behave each day?
You can’t be something VAGUE. You have to decide what it is you want to become.
Read also: 9 Common Goal-Setting Mistakes You Should Avoid
3. Cut Off Anything That’s Trying To Hold You Back
“You can’t grow your finances if you’re always spending money.”
“If you want to change your health, you can’t be hangin’ out at the fridge every day.”
This logic applies to anything you want to change about yourself.
Stop spending time with people who aren’t taking their lives seriously. Stop hanging around when you know you should be doing something productive.
Out with the old. Bring in the new.
If something isn’t helping you improve yourself, YOU HAVE TO CUT IT OFF.
Life’s too short to hang around people who are willfully choosing to stay miserable and unhappy.
Stop making excuses. If it doesn’t serve you…GET RID OF IT.
Read also: 9 Signs of Self Sabotage Drawing you Back
4. Focus on Building Discipline, Not Motivation
Motivation is great. But unless you can take action when you’re UNmotivated…you’ll never change.
Do you know the number one reason people fail at their goals?
They waited for motivation to continue taking action.
But motivation won’t cut it when you want to change yourself.
You must be disciplined.
Show up even when you don’t feel like it. Do the work even when you’re not motivated.
It’s called discipline.
5. Fix Your Daily Habits
Your daily habits dictate your life. That is all.
You aren’t your genetics.
You aren’t your education.
You are the sum of your daily habits.
If you want to change yourself, you must change your daily habits.
Wake up earlier.
Exercise.
Don’t let distractions take you away from YOUR GOALS.
Again. Your life is a PRODUCT of your daily habits.
Change your habits. Change your life.
6. Change Your Surroundings
The people you surround yourself with. The places you frequent. The TV shows you watch. All of it affects you more than you think.
Watch porn every day? You’ll start thinking like a pervert.
Hang out at home watching Netflix all day? You’ll probably stay lazy and overweight.
You have to change what you put into your mind if you want different outputs.
Upgrade your feed. Fill your life with people who are going to lift you higher.
Surround yourself with winners.
7. Upgrade Your Mindset
You are ONLY limited by the limits you believe in.
“If I can think it, I can do it.” – Wayne Gretzky
You think you can’t do something? There’s a good chance YOU ARE RIGHT.
How many times do you beat yourself up with the following thoughts?
- “I’m not good enough”
- “I can’t do this”
- “Why does this keep happening to me?”
Change your mindset. Actively hunt down every negative thought that tries to creep in and replace it with something constructive.
You have the power to change your mindset. Don’t let your thoughts control you.
8. Become a Student of Your Craft
If you stop learning, you stop improving.
Read books. Listen to podcasts. Learn from people who are further along in life than you.
Stop making excuses about why you don’t have time to invest in yourself.
You should NEVER STOP LEARNING.
How could you expect to change yourself if you’re consuming the same junk everyone else is?
Raise your standards. Change yourself.
9. Become Comfortable Being Uncomfortable
If it feels GOOD, you’re not growing.
Wanting to change your life is easy.
Taking action while feeling insecure, uncomfortable, and scared is what changes people.
You will feel resistance. That’s okay.
Most people don’t change because they don’t like the way change feels.
If you want to change, you NEED to become comfortable with being uncomfortable.
10. Be Patient…
Changing yourself won’t happen overnight.
Don’t expect immediate results.
I know you’re eager. We all are.
But real change takes time.
If you stay consistent…things will happen. You will learn. You will improve. But it takes time.
Don’t give up on yourself. Be patient and trust the process.
11. Track Your Progress
How do you improve something if you don’t measure it?
If you never look at your bank account, you won’t know how to improve your finances.
Same thing applies for losing weight or building a consistent workout routine.
You have to track your progress if you want to see continuous improvements.
12. Change Your Identity
Simple.
You don’t CHANGE how you act…YOU CHANGE WHO YOU ARE.
Think about it.
Instead of saying:
“I’m trying to become more disciplined.”
You say…
“I AM disciplined.”
“I want to be confident”
Becomes…
“I AM confident.”
Changing your thoughts and your identity is the final step to changing yourself.
Conclusion
Changing yourself isn’t sorcery. There’s no trick. You don’t have to be ‘woke’ or do any crazy stuff.
You change by becoming a better version of who you already are.
It requires a lot of self-reflection, discipline, patience, and consistency.
If you apply these 12 steps and genuinely want to change…you will.
Give yourself the best gift you could ever receive by changing who you are on the inside.
You’ve got this.
FAQ
Q: Can people really change themselves?
Yes—but only if they’re willing to improve their habits, mindset, and environment.
Q: How long will it take me to change?
Months? Years. Maybe even longer. As long as you stay consistent, day in and day out, you WILL change.
Q: What’s the hardest part of changing yourself?
Letting go of your old hobbies, friends, and bad habits.
Q: Do I have to cut people off in my life?
In most cases…yes. But if there are people in your life that bring you down…you have to distance yourself for your own well-being.
Q: What if I fail or fall back into old habits?
Fall off. Everyone does. The key is to not stay down. Get back up and keep pushing forward.
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