I slowly learned that texting your crush wasn’t about game playing. It was showing up through your words and letting those words make them feel special.
Texting can be used to cultivate comfort and build a healthy connection with someone. Those small words you send throughout the day can even build attraction if done correctly. But there are also a lot of ways you can go about things and create the opposite effect.
Messaging someone is simple. But knowing what to say and how to say it is where most trip up.
When you think of texting as another form of communication, and less of a game, you can navigate your conversations easier.
Reading their cues, texting in appropriate time frames, and matching their energy takes practice. When you know how to properly charm someone through your words, you’ll learn how to keep the conversation going. How to make them laugh, and how to let your relationship grow organically.
Here are 77 tips for texting your crush:
1. Conversation Tips
Start and Maintaining Conversation
1. Keep initial messages short. Small messages can seem more casual and less daunting to respond to.
2. Don’t feel the need to respond right away every time. Slow down the conversation every once in a while.
3. Drop their name every once in a while when appropriate. It personalizes the conversation.
4. Ask open-ended questions. This allows you to learn more about what they think and feel.
5. Match their length of messages. If they’re texting you short replies, don’t overdo it with long messages.
6. Light humor can be very attractive. Try sending them a laughable joke every once in a while.
7. Don’t always use complete sentence structure and correct grammar. Use proper grammar sometimes.
8. Don’t bomb them with messages. Allow them time to respond.
9. Show you’re listening by responding to what they say. Don’t make every conversation about you.
10. Give your compliments sincerely. Nobody likes someone who overdoes the praise.
2. Building Comfort and Trust
11. Don’t send them copypasta messages. Your words should be original every time.
12. Don’t ask heavy questions in the beginning. Keep the conversation light.
13. Don’t flood them with messages if they take a while to reply. Let your message timing match theirs.
14. Use emojis. Sometimes randomly using emojis can add fun to your conversation.
15. Send updates about your day. It gives them something real to talk about.
16. Give them space to miss you. You don’t need to message someone every minute you’re awake.
17. Don’t send a dull “hey” or “hi” just to start the conversation. Say something that sparks conversation.
18. Don’t play “games” by demanding they reply right away. Let them feel as comfortable as you want them to feel.
19. Keep their secrets. If they trusted you enough to tell you something, it’s your job to not spread it.
20. Don’t stress about every message. You’re enough just by being you.
Read also: 100 Quotes for Difficult Relationships
3. Matching Their Energy and Tone
21. Match their energy. Text them playful if they act playful. Be serious if they are.
22. Avoid the comparison game. Comparing them to your ex will make them feel unwanted.
23. Try sending voice notes. Hearing your voice can help dull text messages.
24. Send sweet good morning and good night texts.
25. Avoid sending angry texts. You’ll probably send something you’ll regret.
26. Be consistent with your communication. Avoid disappearing for days on end.
27. Pay attention to the small things. Remember small details they tell you.
28. Say something that will make them think. Don’t be boring with your conversation.
29. Avoid one-word responses. It can make you seem lazy or uncaring.
30. Laugh at their jokes. Even if they’re not that funny. It will make them comfortable.
4. Building Attraction Over Time
31. Avoid spilling your deepest emotions and secrets. Let them get to know you over time.
32. Respond to their messages with comfort. Your response can show you care about their time.
33. Avoid needy late-night texts. Respect their boundaries by not pushing for a response late at night.
34. If you don’t understand something they say, ask them. Don’t make up something to reply back.
35. Send encouraging texts when they tell you about their problems or worries.
36. Send messages that are personalized to them. Don’t send the same generic message to everyone.
37. Find common interests. Continue to talk about things that you both like.
38. Avoid talking too much about yourself. Allow them to share things about themselves.
39. Check in on how they’re feeling. Shows you care about more than just yourself.
40. Avoid being overly sarcastic. Sometimes your tone can’t translate through text.
Read also: 5 Ways to Love Yourself Based on Your Love Language
5. Making Your Crush Feel SPECIAL
41. Send them something that made you think of them.
42. Don’t ghost or expect them to reply if they say they’re busy.
43. Don’t guilt-trip them for not replying right away. Give them a day or two and gently remind them.
44. Flirting can be fun. Just don’t cross any lines by sending something too explicit.
45. Say thank you when they reply. Little things like this can make people want to continue chatting with you.
46. Avoid discussing major arguments in your texts. Don’t create drama where your relationship doesn’t need it.
47. Use periods sometimes. You don’t need to emoji everything you say.
48. Send an encouraging message before they head into something big.
49. If hip hop isn’t your style, don’t say it is. Simply be yourself.
50. Send happy vibes. Nothing is worse than dating a pessimist.
6. Spacing — Giving Them Space
51. If they don’t reply for a few hours, don’t send a “you’re ignoring me” message. Give them space to reply.
52. Celebrate the small victories with them.
53. Create cute inside jokes. Inside jokes can strengthen a connection.
54. Avoid pouring your whole life story into them the first week you meet. Let them get to know you.
55. Allow them to have an opinion different from yours. Don’t @ them every time you disagree.
56. If they open up to you about something serious, send something kind to let them know you’re there.
57. Don’t be strict with your punctuation every time you send a message. Just be you.
58. Send them a message when you notice they’re not feeling well. It shows you pay attention.
7. Keeping Things Light
59. Be patient with them. They’re not living on their phone either.
60. Avoid lightly teasing them when you first start talking. It can be taken seriously through text.
61. Send them that silly picture you saw on Pinterest.
62. Let them text you first sometimes. Relationships should have proper rotation.
63. Don’t treat every conversation like an interview. Have fun with your conversation.
64. Ghosting someone is never the answer. If you need space, tell them—don’t leave them hanging.
65. Allow them to be busy. If they say they have a lot on their plate, don’t bother them with texts.
66. Don’t just say they’re beautiful. Tell them you’re attracted to their smile.
67. Share your favorite music or movies. You’ll spark more conversation.
68. Life’s too short to be someone you’re not. Don’t pretend to like things just to relate to them.
8. Lasting Impressions — Ending on a HIGH NOTE
69. Wait to have serious conversations until your connection feels stronger. Not every text has to be life-changing.
70. Avoid asking them personal questions until you’re comfortable with them. No need to lose them with questions about their past.
71. Leave them smiling with your last message. You never know when your convo will end.
9. Why You Should Care
In a world where texting has become the primary way of communicating with others, it’s no wonder so many people want to know how to text their crush correctly.
By taking these tips into consideration, you’re setting yourself up for success in building a natural connection with your crush over time.
FAQ
Do I need to follow all 77 tips?
No. Use them as guidance, not rules. Take what works for you and your situation.
How often should I text my crush?
Match their energy and pace. Consistency matters more than frequency.
What if I say the wrong thing?
Mistakes happen. Authenticity and kindness matter more than perfect wording.
Is it okay to double text?
Occasionally, yes—but avoid making it a habit, especially early on.
Can texting really build attraction?
Yes. When done thoughtfully, texting can build comfort, trust, and emotional connection over time.
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