Truth be told, self love isn’t just another trendy Instagram hashtag. It’s a daily practice. It’s how you talk to yourself when no one is around. It’s paying attention to the way you treat yourself and your own needs. If you don’t love yourself, you will continue to seek validation and worth from other people that will never be able to give it to you. When you love yourself, the world will treat you that way.
Here are 10 ways you can practice self love so you can start loving yourself from a place of worthiness.
1. Practice Self Acceptance
You can’t love yourself until you accept yourself for who you are RIGHT NOW. Stop waiting until you lose ten pounds, get that promotion, or “fix” what you perceive as your flaws or mistakes. If you only allow yourself to feel good about yourself when you reach certain milestones, you will never feel 100% comfortable in your own skin.
Your value isn’t based on your accomplishments or what you have done. Your value is based on the fact that you are alive right now. Practicing self acceptance means allowing yourself to be both your weaknesses and your strengths. You don’t have to hide your weaknesses, but accept that they don’t define you and you have the power to grow from a place of love.
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2. Speak Kindly to Yourself
The words you say to yourself become your own inner dialogue. The more you repeat negative thoughts and put yourself down, the more you train your mind to believe that you aren’t good enough. Think about how you would feel if someone yelled at you or criticized you all day long. Now think about how you feel when YOU talk to yourself that way.
Start to become aware of the things you say to yourself throughout the day. When you hear yourself thinking something cruel or harmful, stop yourself. Replace that thought with something kind. Eventually, your positive self-talk will rewire how you think about yourself.
Click here to read: 150 Powerful Affirmations to Embrace Your Beauty
3. Set and Keep Boundaries
Self love means setting boundaries and respecting them. When you allow others to walk all over your boundaries over and over again, you’re telling yourself (and them) that your needs don’t matter. This will usually lead to burnout and resentment, and you’ll lose respect for yourself.
Boundaries can include your time, your emotions, or your physical space. They can mean saying no to things that deplete you when people try to guilt you into saying yes. They can mean distancing yourself from negative people that you used to spend a lot of time with. Setting boundaries is about protecting your energy and showing yourself that you matter.
Click here to read: 9 Slow Living Tips for Busy People to Find Peace
4. Forgive Yourself
You can’t love yourself if you are constantly beating yourself up for mistakes you cannot change. Your past does not define you, and you should never let past guilt and shame weigh you down for years. Remember that mistakes happen so you can learn and grow from them. YOU ARE NOT THE SAME PERSON YOU were when you made those mistakes.
Forgiveness isn’t about forgetting what people do to you or not holding them accountable for their actions. Forgiveness is about learning from the situation and telling yourself that you don’t need to continuously punish yourself for it.
5. Honor Your Body
Your body is the only place you will spend every day of your life. How you treat it should reflect how you feel about yourself. If you don’t put time and effort into taking care of your health, you are telling yourself you don’t deserve to be cared for.
Taking care of your body can include getting enough sleep, eating nourishing foods, exercising in a way that doesn’t cause you pain, and going to the doctor for regular checkups. Mental and physical health go hand in hand, and when you care for your body, you’re caring for your mind too.
6. Stop Playing the Comparison Game
Comparison is the fastest way to forget how awesome you are. The more you compare yourself to other people, the more you will overlook your own accomplishments. When you compare yourself to someone else, you’re often comparing your “backstage” to someone else’s “highlight reel,” and that isn’t fair to you.
Next time you find yourself wondering why you aren’t as far as someone else in life, ask yourself how you can become the best version of YOU. You’ll feel more grounded and secure when you stop comparing yourself to others.
7. Schedule Play
If you never allow yourself to have fun, how can you love yourself? I’m sure you like to check things off your to-do list and get things done, but life isn’t all about responsibilities. You also need to spend time doing the things that make you happy.
Make time to do things you love. Whether that be a hobby, going to the spa, or taking your dog for a walk. When you allow yourself time to have fun, you remind yourself that you are worthy of happiness. It also recharges you mentally and emotionally. Harvard Health has shown that engaging in enjoyable activities can lower stress and improve mood. You don’t have to feel guilty for taking time to do things that make YOU happy, even if it is just for 5 minutes.
8. Surround Yourself With the Right People
The people you allow into your life say a lot about how you feel about yourself. If you allow negative, critical, and disrespectful people to crowd your life, it will lower how you feel about yourself.
Surround yourself with positive people that respect your boundaries and want to see you grow. You don’t have to stay friends with people just because you went to school together or have known them since birth. If they are no longer adding anything positive to your life, let them go. Loving yourself enough means surrounding yourself with people that lift you up.
9. Allow Yourself to Feel
Acting like everything is okay when you’re falling to pieces doesn’t mean you love yourself. It tells yourself that you aren’t in a safe space to be yourself. The more you lie to yourself about how you’re feeling, the more you detach yourself from who you really are. Practice loving yourself by trusting your emotions enough to allow yourself to feel them.
You don’t have to tell the world how you’re feeling, but allow yourself to be honest with how you feel. Feel sad? Allow yourself to cry. Feeling anxious? Allow yourself to feel those nerves. By allowing yourself to feel your emotions, you are building trust with yourself, a key component of emotional well-being recognized by the American Psychological Association.
10. Celebrate Your Wins
How can you love yourself if you never allow yourself to feel proud? If you only celebrate the big things in life, you’re cheating yourself out of tons of opportunities to love yourself.
Celebrate your wins no matter how small they may be. Did you finish a task that you’ve been putting off all week? Give yourself some credit. Made a healthy meal instead of ordering pizza? You should celebrate that. The more you appreciate the small things you do each day, the more you will feel proud of yourself. Loving yourself means knowing that you are worthy of celebration every day just for being you.
Final Thoughts
Loving yourself isn’t a decision that you make once and it’s done. Learning to love yourself is reflected in how you treat your body, the boundaries you set for yourself and others, and the people you choose to allow into your life. It’s how you talk to yourself when no one else is listening and how you make time for joy even on the busiest of days.
When you learn how to love yourself, you won’t constantly seek validation from others because you already know you’re amazing. You will feel more secure in your own skin and grounded in who you are as a person. You’ll realize you were enough all along… and once you know that, your whole life will change.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does self love really mean?
Self love means valuing yourself through your actions, boundaries, thoughts, and daily habits, not just how you feel about yourself.
Is self love selfish?
No. Practicing self love allows you to show up healthier, happier, and more present for yourself and others.
How do I start practicing self love if I’ve never done it before?
Start small by speaking kindly to yourself, setting one boundary, or honoring your needs without guilt.
Can self love improve mental health?
Yes. Self love practices like self acceptance, emotional awareness, and healthy boundaries support emotional well-being.
Does self love take time to develop?
Absolutely. Self love is a daily practice that grows stronger the more consistently you show up for yourself.
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